A little bitta bumfluff about me.

This is me. No, hang on, don't become overwhelmed with my staggering beauty and genital twitching curves, I'm the one in the black. Not the penguin.  And for your information that penguin is a very selfish lover, so don't be fooled by its flattering flippers, OK?!
I like herbal and fruit teas, I don't know why that is important but I feel it is. I don't drink caffeine 'coz it makes me anxious. I like books. No, I mean, I really like books. If there were some book that could also offer sexual service I would never leave the house. I don't drink alcohol, don't be scared I'm not going to judge you for that penis colada. I still go out and have fun, the difference is, now I don't throw up on my own breasts and spend the next day crying and texting various friends to apologise afterwards.
I'm very honest,my personality tested for 79% open. I'm in the top three percent for that, suck my honest penis teacher who once said I lied about my P.E kit. I'm very fat. Don't throw Slimfast at me, it's a thyroid thing. I like politics. I like photographs. I like culture. I like Mango Tango fruit smoothies. I like breasts. I like sleep.
When people say I look like Dawn French it doesn't hurt my feelings, it gives them blowey. I dislike most right wing values. I dislike organised religion. I dislike people who tell me there can't not be a God. If you want a God have a God.
I study English and Creative Writing at a university where most people went because they got rejected from others but where I went because it's where my Mum went and it has a big beautiful main building that makes me feel like I'm pulling up at Northanger Abby.
I like people who say they're pissed off when they feel it and dislike people who wait until you've left the room before they talk about how much you've pissed them off. I like all my beautiful friends and drinking pots of tea in Mello Mello's. I like beans, I like toast. I like to talk about social theory with people who know what they mean when they say 'poverty' because they've felt it. Because to them it has been a reality. I like inspiring people. I like to fart in the bath. I like the idea that one day I can write my memoirs and the first line in the first chapter will begin 'I still feel lucky'.
All this.
I still feel lucky.